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The musings of a liberal, feminist dyke who finds herself in the most unlikely of situations.....
Thursday, April 29, 2004
And just one more...because I tend to use a bit of profanity in my blog, I'm going to I'm gonna use Margaret Cho again to explain--I thought what she had to say about being "on the fringes of polite society" to be very interesting. (from her blog conversation with another of her readers)
1/23/2004
Potty Mouth
> ----- Original Message -----
> Subject: Potty Mouth
>
> Although we are two very
> different women, I agree
> with much of what you have
> to say. I must admit I am
> more conservative. What
> I don't understand is why
> must you write using so much
> profanity? I'm not talking about
> the occasional "fuck" sprinkled
> here and there.
That would be okay, perhaps with a disclaimer like "Excuse my French" attached to it or something. I know. I had a friend who was a Franciscan Monk who was always gossiping about his fellow monks that he shared his monastery with, and he would call them 'a fucking asshole' but not with his voice, just breathing it, mouthing the words, so as not to actually say the word, but to imply it as much as he could.
> I think you alienate a lot of
> people who don't like to read
> or hear that kind of language.
That is too bad. You know, I would very much chalk it up to habit, and really not hearing the word as obscene but more like punctuation. When you live on the fringes of polite society, the rules shift, whereas we are not so bound to language. It means less, as we have come to believe that we mean less. It's hard to understand if you never lived where I have, or plunged into the kind of culture that I have immersed myself in. When you don't belong in polite society, what reason have you to be polite? I actually rarely use what is termed as profanity in my day to day speech, but my writing and performance style is different. My voice as a writer comes from an interior dictator, as opposed to an interior decorator. Perhaps if the language I use is bothersome, then the idea that you live in another world where privilege and pride are common things, not something that is feigned and squeezed into like an ill fitting dress is what actually upsets you. But if you hold many of the same opinions I do, is it impossible to accept that someone who speaks differently could still be heard?
> You use the term
> "motherfucker" so much.
> Is that really necessary?
Actually, it is "Muthafucka" - but we don't need to go there, it is all semantics.
> Do you really want
> to fuck your mother?
Oh goodness, of course not. But that is not what muthafucka means. In my world, muthafucka is a word of strength, with negative and positive connotations, without the actual sex act nor maternal implications. Mother and fucking have nothing to do with muthafucka. Muthafucka is a word of war, peace, glory, hatred. It is as common as a comma, it is not taken literally, ever. Ever.
> I am mortified to even
> be writing these words;
> they look and sound so
> ugly to me.
That is sad. I am sorry for you. The world can be an ugly place, and if this is what makes it ugly, than I can't imagine what else causes you pain.
> Is all this foul language
> necessary to "keep it real"?
Well, yes and no. You really don't put in words to keep anything real. I believe that it is real if it is real. I don't know how to keep anything real, because why keep it real if it has to be kept? Real is real.
> I don't think it's real, any
> more than so-called "reality
> television" is real.
You are certainly right about that!
> In my opinion, keeping it
> real involves making
> well-written, well thought-out
> statements that reflect a
> person's point of view.
Yes, you are right again.
> If this potty-mouth is only
> so much window dressing
> then your messageis being
> drowned out by it.
That would be for the people who are like you, not everyone who reads or listens to my work. I haven't thought of my words like window dressing, because I don't think of anything when I write. I simply think that what flows onto the page is what is supposed to be there, but then that is out of my hands once it is given to the reader. Potty mouth is something of an immature dismissal of my work as an artist and an activist, so that is what I see as foul language.
> If that's really what you
> hear in your mind, maybe
> you should clear out the static.
But it isn't static to me, nor is it to many people, but then again, it is all a matter of taste. It isn't to be judged, more just taken at face value, or not.
> You seem like a nice person,
> but if that's the way you
> really talk I could never
> have a conversation with you.
But it isn't the way I talk all the time, just the way I write sometimes. And see, we just had a fine conversation. You are super nice too, and I will remember your advice in the future. Not that I will adhere to it, but I will remember.
Best,
Margaret Cho
> Beth
> Charlotte, North Carolina
> (Yes, I am a Southerner.
> So I believe in manners
> and courtesy, so sue me!)
(Oh Beth, you are such a cut up!)
1/23/2004
Potty Mouth
> ----- Original Message -----
> Subject: Potty Mouth
>
> Although we are two very
> different women, I agree
> with much of what you have
> to say. I must admit I am
> more conservative. What
> I don't understand is why
> must you write using so much
> profanity? I'm not talking about
> the occasional "fuck" sprinkled
> here and there.
That would be okay, perhaps with a disclaimer like "Excuse my French" attached to it or something. I know. I had a friend who was a Franciscan Monk who was always gossiping about his fellow monks that he shared his monastery with, and he would call them 'a fucking asshole' but not with his voice, just breathing it, mouthing the words, so as not to actually say the word, but to imply it as much as he could.
> I think you alienate a lot of
> people who don't like to read
> or hear that kind of language.
That is too bad. You know, I would very much chalk it up to habit, and really not hearing the word as obscene but more like punctuation. When you live on the fringes of polite society, the rules shift, whereas we are not so bound to language. It means less, as we have come to believe that we mean less. It's hard to understand if you never lived where I have, or plunged into the kind of culture that I have immersed myself in. When you don't belong in polite society, what reason have you to be polite? I actually rarely use what is termed as profanity in my day to day speech, but my writing and performance style is different. My voice as a writer comes from an interior dictator, as opposed to an interior decorator. Perhaps if the language I use is bothersome, then the idea that you live in another world where privilege and pride are common things, not something that is feigned and squeezed into like an ill fitting dress is what actually upsets you. But if you hold many of the same opinions I do, is it impossible to accept that someone who speaks differently could still be heard?
> You use the term
> "motherfucker" so much.
> Is that really necessary?
Actually, it is "Muthafucka" - but we don't need to go there, it is all semantics.
> Do you really want
> to fuck your mother?
Oh goodness, of course not. But that is not what muthafucka means. In my world, muthafucka is a word of strength, with negative and positive connotations, without the actual sex act nor maternal implications. Mother and fucking have nothing to do with muthafucka. Muthafucka is a word of war, peace, glory, hatred. It is as common as a comma, it is not taken literally, ever. Ever.
> I am mortified to even
> be writing these words;
> they look and sound so
> ugly to me.
That is sad. I am sorry for you. The world can be an ugly place, and if this is what makes it ugly, than I can't imagine what else causes you pain.
> Is all this foul language
> necessary to "keep it real"?
Well, yes and no. You really don't put in words to keep anything real. I believe that it is real if it is real. I don't know how to keep anything real, because why keep it real if it has to be kept? Real is real.
> I don't think it's real, any
> more than so-called "reality
> television" is real.
You are certainly right about that!
> In my opinion, keeping it
> real involves making
> well-written, well thought-out
> statements that reflect a
> person's point of view.
Yes, you are right again.
> If this potty-mouth is only
> so much window dressing
> then your messageis being
> drowned out by it.
That would be for the people who are like you, not everyone who reads or listens to my work. I haven't thought of my words like window dressing, because I don't think of anything when I write. I simply think that what flows onto the page is what is supposed to be there, but then that is out of my hands once it is given to the reader. Potty mouth is something of an immature dismissal of my work as an artist and an activist, so that is what I see as foul language.
> If that's really what you
> hear in your mind, maybe
> you should clear out the static.
But it isn't static to me, nor is it to many people, but then again, it is all a matter of taste. It isn't to be judged, more just taken at face value, or not.
> You seem like a nice person,
> but if that's the way you
> really talk I could never
> have a conversation with you.
But it isn't the way I talk all the time, just the way I write sometimes. And see, we just had a fine conversation. You are super nice too, and I will remember your advice in the future. Not that I will adhere to it, but I will remember.
Best,
Margaret Cho
> Beth
> Charlotte, North Carolina
> (Yes, I am a Southerner.
> So I believe in manners
> and courtesy, so sue me!)
(Oh Beth, you are such a cut up!)
dear mr. president
Alix Olson.
Dear Mr. President:
I don’t wanna be in your military, I don’t wanna bury
my own kind
I wanna make up my own mind about who I hate,
not what the national slate
has in mind.
you see, the american interest is rarely in mine.
and I’ve got my own wars to wage,
I don’t need to engage in your war for oil overseas,
in-between my lover’s legs
is slick enough for me. I’m the lesbian minority, see,
so I don’t need a major to tell me what to be
or who to do things to
somewhere across the pacific.
my sex is too specific to report to a general.
and in general, dykes don’t respond to command,
so why do we demand
to be a part of this irrational masculine swarmy
that poses as a national army--
see, I’ve seen armies
seen ‘em on picket lines, welfare lines,
seen ‘em storming the Capitol,
storming the streets,
demanding justice and peace.
I’ve heard of armies in history,
in Birmingham, in Montgomerey.
but these dressed-to-kill boys
with their made-to-kill toys
these yellow ribbons that choke trees, please,
it’s a joke,
a sadistic display of militaristic play that ends in
american dreams for the owners of both teams--
and who suffers? who buffers the attack?
who lacks the cash to decline the invitation
to the nation’s most expensive party?
those hearty boys promised schooling,
then sent on their way
to collect their pay from the grave?
well, I don’t mind being war-depraved, honey,
we can fight for more than big boys and their money:
I’d rather fight phil knight, bomb all his bonds
I’d rather wage a gay crusade on the pope,
grope my girl in front of his nose.
I’d rather pose a problem to disney,
expose michael eisner as a meiser,
mickey mouse as leader of the rat race--
just slice right down that rodent’s face.
and it’s a disgrace to be a rapist
of developing nations
when we can’t stop the rape
of developing girls.
I’d rather unfurl an attack
on our money guzzling undercover embezzling enemies-
imprisoning just us with no dollar power
impersonating justice from their donald trump tower
with their billion dollars trillion crimes
waging their personal war on the poor
for more power in this world of
ABC NBC CBS -- his country runs from
CEO to shining CEO,
Sending us across the ocean for the promotion
of their cash-devotion ideology.
well, I don’t desire your superstar badge of bravery
for enduring modern-day slavery
in your maniacally economically-driven death trap.
anyway, I’d give the U.S a bad rap,
I’d kiss every fine iraqi dyke on the front line,
fuck national pride,
I’d go to their side--
i prefer crossnational desire to crossfire anyway.
and i don’t need your fatigue uniform
to perform my battles.
I’m wearing layers of tired just from battling
the liars of our system every day.
and my Dear Mr. President:
I’d rather die, lyin’ in the heat of a fuck I call mine
than in the fuckin’ line of duty
you’ve made mine.
but, fine, it’s the new big thing to demand inclusion
in your land-intrusion ethic-free military,
to request same-sex affirmative action
to de-factionalize who dies in your
money-for-the-man
C-span cam scam, lost-and-found game
you call war
where we get to lose our lives
when you’ve found what’s worth more,
well, when this dyke goes down,
she’ll go down
knowing what it’s for.
Ok. NOW I feel better. (-:
Alix Olson.
Dear Mr. President:
I don’t wanna be in your military, I don’t wanna bury
my own kind
I wanna make up my own mind about who I hate,
not what the national slate
has in mind.
you see, the american interest is rarely in mine.
and I’ve got my own wars to wage,
I don’t need to engage in your war for oil overseas,
in-between my lover’s legs
is slick enough for me. I’m the lesbian minority, see,
so I don’t need a major to tell me what to be
or who to do things to
somewhere across the pacific.
my sex is too specific to report to a general.
and in general, dykes don’t respond to command,
so why do we demand
to be a part of this irrational masculine swarmy
that poses as a national army--
see, I’ve seen armies
seen ‘em on picket lines, welfare lines,
seen ‘em storming the Capitol,
storming the streets,
demanding justice and peace.
I’ve heard of armies in history,
in Birmingham, in Montgomerey.
but these dressed-to-kill boys
with their made-to-kill toys
these yellow ribbons that choke trees, please,
it’s a joke,
a sadistic display of militaristic play that ends in
american dreams for the owners of both teams--
and who suffers? who buffers the attack?
who lacks the cash to decline the invitation
to the nation’s most expensive party?
those hearty boys promised schooling,
then sent on their way
to collect their pay from the grave?
well, I don’t mind being war-depraved, honey,
we can fight for more than big boys and their money:
I’d rather fight phil knight, bomb all his bonds
I’d rather wage a gay crusade on the pope,
grope my girl in front of his nose.
I’d rather pose a problem to disney,
expose michael eisner as a meiser,
mickey mouse as leader of the rat race--
just slice right down that rodent’s face.
and it’s a disgrace to be a rapist
of developing nations
when we can’t stop the rape
of developing girls.
I’d rather unfurl an attack
on our money guzzling undercover embezzling enemies-
imprisoning just us with no dollar power
impersonating justice from their donald trump tower
with their billion dollars trillion crimes
waging their personal war on the poor
for more power in this world of
ABC NBC CBS -- his country runs from
CEO to shining CEO,
Sending us across the ocean for the promotion
of their cash-devotion ideology.
well, I don’t desire your superstar badge of bravery
for enduring modern-day slavery
in your maniacally economically-driven death trap.
anyway, I’d give the U.S a bad rap,
I’d kiss every fine iraqi dyke on the front line,
fuck national pride,
I’d go to their side--
i prefer crossnational desire to crossfire anyway.
and i don’t need your fatigue uniform
to perform my battles.
I’m wearing layers of tired just from battling
the liars of our system every day.
and my Dear Mr. President:
I’d rather die, lyin’ in the heat of a fuck I call mine
than in the fuckin’ line of duty
you’ve made mine.
but, fine, it’s the new big thing to demand inclusion
in your land-intrusion ethic-free military,
to request same-sex affirmative action
to de-factionalize who dies in your
money-for-the-man
C-span cam scam, lost-and-found game
you call war
where we get to lose our lives
when you’ve found what’s worth more,
well, when this dyke goes down,
she’ll go down
knowing what it’s for.
Ok. NOW I feel better. (-:
Natalie Dee is cool...thanks Kim for the links.
Tryin' my hand at this whole html/putting pictures into my blog thing. Yay. It worked. Thanks once more Kim.
Soooo....in addition to looking at random cartoons on the net, I've been keeping to my regular schedule of mind numbingly boring but insanely busy days at work followed by nights of doing not much but sitting on my ass in front of the TV and playing with my dog Abby. I've been feeling really guilty lately about not accomplishing much outside of work. Christie and I are talking about joining a gym together next month and I want to do that (we want to look hot in our wedding duds)...I'm just hoping I can stick to it. Since we can't really get there at the same time most days due to work schedules, I'm hoping that I won't get bored after 2 months like last time and just stop going. I don't really know what happened to me. I mean...I'm responsible and clean up after myself in general and pay the bills on time and maintain good relationships with my friends (at least my new ones that still like me even though I'm a homo) and my girlfriend and all but I used to be such an overachiever in every area of my life. I don't know what what changed or when I turned into a bit of a slacker but it makes me a bit disappointed in myself that I did. My apartment could use so much work...need to get rid of a hell of a lot of clutter but instead of doing it, I sit there and watch "Clean Sweep" on TV and watch other people do it to their houses. Nearly all my college friends have masters degrees or are working on PhDs and here I sit...still not sure what I want to be when I grow up. I need to come out to my parents so I can move the hell on with my life. Most days I can convince myself that I'm generally a success in life so far, but some days it gets to me and I feel like a loser. My theory on this is that I spent so much of my life trying to live up to other peoples' version of me--what they thought would make a good "me".....goes to church....gets good grades.....what my parents think of me blah blah blah....and now that I no longer define myself by my religiosity and I'm no longer in school and no matter what I do my parent's won't think of me as a "good daughter" just becuase I like girls....The subculture that I grew up in sets you up not to think for yourself --to define your worth by a generally legalistic set of standards. I must admit that while I may flounder a bit at times, I am proud of myself for breaking away from all that. I guess I'm just carving out my own space in the world and learning about who I REALLY am. I'm trying to learn what makes me feel confident about myself and how to live the way I want live instead of by everyone else's standards. Guess it's a bit of a rocky road at times and is just one o' those days. I'll probably be fine tomorrow. Laa dee dah. I think I need to go listen to some Alix Olson. (-:
Tuesday, April 27, 2004
| Your Ultimate Purity Score Is... | ||
| Category | Your Score | Average |
| Self-Lovin' | 66.7% Explored the pleasures of the flesh | 65.1% |
| Shamelessness | 90.5% Has yet to see self in mirror | 79.4% |
| Sex Drive | 92.1% The Pope is envious | 77.8% |
| Straightness | 100% | 45% |
| Gayness | 28.6% At least one weekend of ecstacy | 83.6% |
| Fucking Sick | 91.2% Refreshingly normal | 90% |
| You are 75.45% pure Average Score: 72.7% | ||
THE REAL FACE OF THE RELIGIOUS RIGHT: Compassionate Conservativism at its Finest
Michigan Preparing To Let Doctors Refuse To Treat Gays
by 365Gay.com Newscenter Staff
April 21, 2004
(Lansing, Michigan) Doctors or other health care providers could not be disciplined or sued if they refuse to treat gay patients under legislation passed Wednesday by the Michigan House.
The bill allows health care workers to refuse service to anyone on moral, ethical or religious grounds.
The Republican dominated House passed the measure as dozens of Catholics looked on from the gallery. The Michigan Catholic Conference, which pushed for the bills, hosted a legislative day for Catholics on Wednesday at the state Capitol.
The bills now go the Senate, which also is controlled by Republicans.
The Conscientious Objector Policy Act would allow health care providers to assert their objection within 24 hours of when they receive notice of a patient or procedure with which they don't agree. However, it would prohibit emergency treatment to be refused.
Three other three bills that could affect LGBT health care were also passed by the House Wednesday which would exempt a health insurer or health facility from providing or covering a health care procedure that violated ethical, moral or religious principles reflected in their bylaws or mission statement.
Opponents of the bills said they're worried they would allow providers to refuse service for any reason. For example, they said an emergency medical technicians could refuse to answer a call from the residence of gay couple because they don't approve of homosexuality.
Rep. Chris Kolb (D-Ann Arbor) the first openly gay legislator in Michigan, pointed out that while the legislation prohibits racial discrimination by health care providers, it doesn't ban discrimination based on a person's sexual orientation.
"Are you telling me that a health care provider can deny me medical treatment because of my sexual orientation? I hope not," he said.
"I think it's a terrible slippery slope upon which we embark," said Rep. Jack Minore (D-Flint) before voting against the bill.
Paul A. Long, vice president for public policy for the Michigan Catholic Conference, said the bills promote the constitutional right to religious freedom.
"Individual and institutional health care providers can and should maintain their mission and their services without compromising faith-based teaching," he said in a written statement.
****************************************************************************
Ok, so my friend Kim blogged about this yesterday, but I wanted to post the article too. It truly leaves me incredulous, but I believe it's the perfect example of everything that I stand against. Makes me wonder what my Catholic friends from college would think about this....of course they've mostly ditched me anyway once they found out I was a homo, so I guess I don't really have to ask. And they say we have an "agenda"...Makes me laugh out loud.
Michigan Preparing To Let Doctors Refuse To Treat Gays
by 365Gay.com Newscenter Staff
April 21, 2004
(Lansing, Michigan) Doctors or other health care providers could not be disciplined or sued if they refuse to treat gay patients under legislation passed Wednesday by the Michigan House.
The bill allows health care workers to refuse service to anyone on moral, ethical or religious grounds.
The Republican dominated House passed the measure as dozens of Catholics looked on from the gallery. The Michigan Catholic Conference, which pushed for the bills, hosted a legislative day for Catholics on Wednesday at the state Capitol.
The bills now go the Senate, which also is controlled by Republicans.
The Conscientious Objector Policy Act would allow health care providers to assert their objection within 24 hours of when they receive notice of a patient or procedure with which they don't agree. However, it would prohibit emergency treatment to be refused.
Three other three bills that could affect LGBT health care were also passed by the House Wednesday which would exempt a health insurer or health facility from providing or covering a health care procedure that violated ethical, moral or religious principles reflected in their bylaws or mission statement.
Opponents of the bills said they're worried they would allow providers to refuse service for any reason. For example, they said an emergency medical technicians could refuse to answer a call from the residence of gay couple because they don't approve of homosexuality.
Rep. Chris Kolb (D-Ann Arbor) the first openly gay legislator in Michigan, pointed out that while the legislation prohibits racial discrimination by health care providers, it doesn't ban discrimination based on a person's sexual orientation.
"Are you telling me that a health care provider can deny me medical treatment because of my sexual orientation? I hope not," he said.
"I think it's a terrible slippery slope upon which we embark," said Rep. Jack Minore (D-Flint) before voting against the bill.
Paul A. Long, vice president for public policy for the Michigan Catholic Conference, said the bills promote the constitutional right to religious freedom.
"Individual and institutional health care providers can and should maintain their mission and their services without compromising faith-based teaching," he said in a written statement.
****************************************************************************
Ok, so my friend Kim blogged about this yesterday, but I wanted to post the article too. It truly leaves me incredulous, but I believe it's the perfect example of everything that I stand against. Makes me wonder what my Catholic friends from college would think about this....of course they've mostly ditched me anyway once they found out I was a homo, so I guess I don't really have to ask. And they say we have an "agenda"...Makes me laugh out loud.
Monday, April 26, 2004
Quick funny work story since I've been all "political/social activist" lately...
Remember my communion wafer story? This is an add on to that.
Customer: Do you have that "communion-to-go"?
Me: Would you like to Biggie size that?
(ok...not really...but that's what I wanted to say.)
Gawwwwwwwwwwwd I hate my job. Gets worse every day. I hate my job. I hate my customers (most of all). I hate my employers. I hate my coworkers....I need to get outta here...either that or get over this bad attitude o' mine. We'll see which happens first.
Remember my communion wafer story? This is an add on to that.
Customer: Do you have that "communion-to-go"?
Me: Would you like to Biggie size that?
(ok...not really...but that's what I wanted to say.)
Gawwwwwwwwwwwd I hate my job. Gets worse every day. I hate my job. I hate my customers (most of all). I hate my employers. I hate my coworkers....I need to get outta here...either that or get over this bad attitude o' mine. We'll see which happens first.
Thursday, April 22, 2004
Please, if you have a moment, take the time to write a brief letter to your congressmen today. Or even just use the form letter they already have...anything to let our numbers and voices be heard. The following quote is from one of the assholes testifying today before the Congressional hearings about the anti-gay constitutional ammendment. We know they're hearing this! It's up to us to make sure they hear us too!
"Recent developments in family law, both in the United States and abroad, necessitate a national strategy to preserve marriage's central role in the creation, and formation, of our posterity. Homosexual advocates are prepared to litigate tirelessly to force a new national consensus regarding marriage, reducing it to simply a form of "friendship recognized by the police.." -- Dwight Duncan, Counsel Massachusetts Family Institute
If this makes you as mad as it makes me:
Visit the HRC website and use their Take Action feature to let your congressmen know where you stand on the Federal Marriage Ammendment here!
Their general Take Action page is here!
"Recent developments in family law, both in the United States and abroad, necessitate a national strategy to preserve marriage's central role in the creation, and formation, of our posterity. Homosexual advocates are prepared to litigate tirelessly to force a new national consensus regarding marriage, reducing it to simply a form of "friendship recognized by the police.." -- Dwight Duncan, Counsel Massachusetts Family Institute
If this makes you as mad as it makes me:
Visit the HRC website and use their Take Action feature to let your congressmen know where you stand on the Federal Marriage Ammendment here!
Their general Take Action page is here!
Wednesday, April 21, 2004
I love Margaret Cho!
(in an open letter to Gov. Schwarzenegger)
"...you cannot stop people from loving each other. What is going on is beautiful. Don't you think that it will be peaceful and joyous if you just let it be? What are you protecting us from? Heterosexuality? Homosexuality? Bigotry? Prejudice? Homophobia? Heterophobia? Flying bouquets of flowers? Rice thrown about willy nilly? The song "Here Comes the Bride" changing to "Here Comes Gay Pride?" What affect does this have on you, other than that it inflames your own prejudice and beliefs that gays and lesbians should not have the same rights as all other Americans?.......Yet the weight of the state just kind of rolls off your big shoulders, because I haven't seen you do anything except agree with the right wing conservatives who have nothing to gain in the war for same sex marriage except the satisfaction of knowing that they can control the citizens of our nation and impede their freedom. Is it that immoral to you that there is love between consenting adults which has nothing to do with bigamy, bestiality, incest or any of the other perversions the theocrats love to fantasize about - that will defy the status quo? Are you really afraid that this will open the floodgates of faggotry in the USA? Suddenly, the state will start to resemble Berlin in the early '30s? It will be the Weimar Republic all over again, and we might - God forbid - experience a renaissance of art and culture and tolerance. Can I play Sally Bowles? Perhaps the idyll didn't last for them, but it wasn't because there was a 'religious right' there to stop the 'madness' of freedom and acceptance, it was Hitler. But I don't have to tell you about that, do I? You know a lot about him. A little more than most people do, I would say. But I am not here to judge your role models. It just concerns me when you try to emulate them. He really hated homosexuals...."
(In a letter to everyone)
Step up
"Step up your game. No matter who you are or what you feel about homosexuality. If you are gay, lesbian, transgendered, bisexual, bi-curious, metrosexual, heterosexual, celibate, hermaphrodite, a satyr, a succubus, a fucking human being - and especially if you are a fucking human being, and really want to live in a country where all people are equal - not separate, not 'civil-unionized,' not lied to about your rights - realize that same sex marriage will not harm you. It will not make gay people more 'gay.' It will not make you gay unless you already are. It will not make your children gay, unless they are anyway. It will not change your life in the least, unless you are gay and want to marry your partner. Then it will transform your life, because it will change your status from second class citizen to first, where we should be.
If we are not absolutely strident, insistent, unflinching about lifting the ban on same sex marriage, if we settle on our presidential hopefuls fence sitting position of 'civil union,' then we might as well forfeit the Constitution, cross out all the Amendments, knock down the Statue of Liberty (it was a gift from France anyway - those peace lovers - who needs 'em?), reverse Roe vs. Wade, pretend Stonewall never happened, reinstate Prohibition, not let women vote, derail the Underground Railroad, bring back slavery, take out all the tea bags from the Boston harbors, give Patrick Henry death instead of liberty, because he's fucking dead now anyway, knock Paul Revere off the horse, realize that George Washington lied, albeit posthumously, besides, all those dudes had slaves anyway, get back on the Mayflower and go back to England. The only problem would be trying to bring the native Americans back to life and restore their nations that we so cavalierly destroyed in our own pursuit of religious 'freedom.'
Without the reality of same sex marriage, there is no freedom. This is not an argument about homosexuality, God, what is in the Bible, what is in your moral value system or what you feel is ethical. It is a no-argument zone. No spins here, not in the least. It is about upholding the idea that we are the representation of freedom in the world. That to be an American is to be free. Unless we have same sex marriage legalized and recognized by every state, then we are not free. We are hypocrites, for we are allowing a certain group of our population freedoms while denying others those same rights. It is discrimination and that is that. If the theocrats successfully ban same sex marriage, then what is next? What rights go up in front of the unjust jury then?..."
(in an open letter to Gov. Schwarzenegger)
"...you cannot stop people from loving each other. What is going on is beautiful. Don't you think that it will be peaceful and joyous if you just let it be? What are you protecting us from? Heterosexuality? Homosexuality? Bigotry? Prejudice? Homophobia? Heterophobia? Flying bouquets of flowers? Rice thrown about willy nilly? The song "Here Comes the Bride" changing to "Here Comes Gay Pride?" What affect does this have on you, other than that it inflames your own prejudice and beliefs that gays and lesbians should not have the same rights as all other Americans?.......Yet the weight of the state just kind of rolls off your big shoulders, because I haven't seen you do anything except agree with the right wing conservatives who have nothing to gain in the war for same sex marriage except the satisfaction of knowing that they can control the citizens of our nation and impede their freedom. Is it that immoral to you that there is love between consenting adults which has nothing to do with bigamy, bestiality, incest or any of the other perversions the theocrats love to fantasize about - that will defy the status quo? Are you really afraid that this will open the floodgates of faggotry in the USA? Suddenly, the state will start to resemble Berlin in the early '30s? It will be the Weimar Republic all over again, and we might - God forbid - experience a renaissance of art and culture and tolerance. Can I play Sally Bowles? Perhaps the idyll didn't last for them, but it wasn't because there was a 'religious right' there to stop the 'madness' of freedom and acceptance, it was Hitler. But I don't have to tell you about that, do I? You know a lot about him. A little more than most people do, I would say. But I am not here to judge your role models. It just concerns me when you try to emulate them. He really hated homosexuals...."
(In a letter to everyone)
Step up
"Step up your game. No matter who you are or what you feel about homosexuality. If you are gay, lesbian, transgendered, bisexual, bi-curious, metrosexual, heterosexual, celibate, hermaphrodite, a satyr, a succubus, a fucking human being - and especially if you are a fucking human being, and really want to live in a country where all people are equal - not separate, not 'civil-unionized,' not lied to about your rights - realize that same sex marriage will not harm you. It will not make gay people more 'gay.' It will not make you gay unless you already are. It will not make your children gay, unless they are anyway. It will not change your life in the least, unless you are gay and want to marry your partner. Then it will transform your life, because it will change your status from second class citizen to first, where we should be.
If we are not absolutely strident, insistent, unflinching about lifting the ban on same sex marriage, if we settle on our presidential hopefuls fence sitting position of 'civil union,' then we might as well forfeit the Constitution, cross out all the Amendments, knock down the Statue of Liberty (it was a gift from France anyway - those peace lovers - who needs 'em?), reverse Roe vs. Wade, pretend Stonewall never happened, reinstate Prohibition, not let women vote, derail the Underground Railroad, bring back slavery, take out all the tea bags from the Boston harbors, give Patrick Henry death instead of liberty, because he's fucking dead now anyway, knock Paul Revere off the horse, realize that George Washington lied, albeit posthumously, besides, all those dudes had slaves anyway, get back on the Mayflower and go back to England. The only problem would be trying to bring the native Americans back to life and restore their nations that we so cavalierly destroyed in our own pursuit of religious 'freedom.'
Without the reality of same sex marriage, there is no freedom. This is not an argument about homosexuality, God, what is in the Bible, what is in your moral value system or what you feel is ethical. It is a no-argument zone. No spins here, not in the least. It is about upholding the idea that we are the representation of freedom in the world. That to be an American is to be free. Unless we have same sex marriage legalized and recognized by every state, then we are not free. We are hypocrites, for we are allowing a certain group of our population freedoms while denying others those same rights. It is discrimination and that is that. If the theocrats successfully ban same sex marriage, then what is next? What rights go up in front of the unjust jury then?..."
Thursday, April 08, 2004
Phew. Finally getting a few minutes to update my blog. LOTS o' news folks. First of all...the best news! On Monday, April 5th, my girlfriend shocked me (in a really good way) by asking me to marry her! Wow! I know we had talked many times about our future together and even about having a ceremony someday, but I had NO idea what she had up her sleeve. (-: Evidently, she had planned to ask me while we were away in London or in New York, but due to a strange comedy of errors, every time she had it planned something happened to mess things up. The last night we were in New York we went to the top of the Empire State Building and she was going to ask me there, but I think I messed that one up myself )-: ....we had waited in line for two hours and I was tired, my feet hurt, and I wanted to leave before she got the chance (sorry, sweetheart...I had no idea)...sooooo....April 5th was the one year anniversary from our first date and we were supposed to go out to this fancy restaurant, but me being the dork that I am...had to go and get a nasty cold. I was all gross and stuffy, but Christie came over and we were just hanging out on the couch....all of a sudden she sat up on the edge of the couch and had this really weird (I now know she was just nervous) (-: look on her face. Of course, me being the person I am, I had to keep asking her what was wrong and why did she get up and blah blah I talk too much blah...When she looked at me (I'll never forget the sweet look on her face) and said "Rach, I actually wanted to ask you to marry me." Then she gave me a ring. *big huge smile* Speechless and instantly cured from feeling shitty, it took me a few seconds to get past the shock, give her a giant hug and say yes about a thousand times. (-: She proceeded to tell me about how she had carried the ring around the WHOLE time we were away and how her big plan had been messed up....but....ya know....I don't even care...just the way she was looking at me when she asked me was so romantic that it made absolutely NO difference "where" we were. I LOVE the ring she got all by herself...it fit perfectly, and it's very "me"...something I would have chosen myself. It's a platinum band with a diamond in a suspended setting where the band meets at the top. Very cool.
You know, it's very strange. It's funny how love works...it just keeps growing and there's kind of this unlimited supply...you think you love someone the most that you possible can and then you find out that you love them even more. We were committed and connected and we loved each other a LOT before this, but it's amazing how much MORE in love and committed and connected we feel now. It's added a new dimension of permanence to our relationship in such an awesome way. It's funny because I don't think I EVER really spent time thinking about any kind of "wedding" stuff in the context of planning my own. I didn't know I'd ever even WANT that, but now...I'm SO excited about it. I can't wait to make a commitment to her in front of the people that love and support us. No matter what our country says, this marriage will be the real deal for us. I keep thinking about what it will be like, and I just can't wait. I love Christie so much and I'm absolutely sure that she's the only person for me. It's almost strange for someone that can be as indecisive as I can to be SO SURE about something, but I really am. I'm so honored that someone like her would pick me to love. I haven't ever experienced this feeling before, I don't think--of being totally and unconditionally loved back just as much as I love her. I honestly didn't know that it could be as good as it is. I'm still kind of stunned that the "storybook romance" thing actually happened to me. Half the time, I don't feel like I deserve it. I'm so incredibly lucky! I never want to take this for granted. I am totally and completely twitterpated! (-:
The only thing that could make us more happy is if everyone took this as seriously as we do. We have some awesome supportive friends--both gay and straight--who ARE happy for and supportive of us, so it has been really fun to share our happiness with them. It's very strange though--kind of brings this whole gay-marriage debate to a very personal place since it's so very few of my friends or family that I had before we became a couple--not to be able to share this with our families, put it in the paper, show off the ring to everyone, be disgustingly sappy in public (-: etc....Especially the people I've told at work....I just get this polite smile....as if they think I'm a little kid playing "pretend" or something. They have no clue. One told me I was a "funny girl"...one said "what are the rules on that in Pennsylvania"....one said "it's a funny world we live in"....and none have brought it up to me ONCE since I told them or even cared to see the ring or anything. Thank GOD Andrea came by the other day...she's been off of work for a few months now having a really rough time with her pregnancy, but it was so cool to be able to tell someone who was genuinely as happy as I am. She's doing much better and is supposed to come back to work on Tuesday. Yay!
Anyway....The little London/New York vacation was great! It started off a little shaky, but...it turned out to be a fun fun time. Some of the highlights: Well, the beginning of the trip started off smoothly....took the train to New York, got to the airport and to London without a hitch, but then we hit baggage claim...ugggh! Somebody--some ABSOLUTE MORON--we came to find out, took my suitcase instead of theirs. I feel the need to mention that IT WAS A DIFFERENT COLOR! So the first few days were a bit rocky...ended up having to find a mall and buy a bunch of stuff since I had no guarantee I'd get my stuff back at all and I had no clothes or toiletries. The airport had the guy's suitcase that he left there, but no way of contacting him, so needless to say I was ECSTATIC when I found out that he had contacted them and I got my stuff back. After 3 and a half days without anything, I almost didn't care that both of our perfumes were missing....very weird that perfume would be the only thing missing from the suitcase, but....we got everything else. Anyway.....We saw lots of sights in London, hit a few really cool museums, went to Leeds Castle and Oxford, stopped by some "gay London" spots, and ate Cadbury McFlurrys every night. Yum. (The McDonalds' there makes McFlurrys with Cadbury eggs). One of the funniest times (in hindsight) was the night we decided to hit this girl bar called "Candy Bar". They actually don't allow boys in unless they are guests of a dyke. lol Anyway...we sat at the bar, tried to look cool, and ordered a "pint" each of this god-awful bitter beer...we were only a few sips into it when Smouse accidentally spilled the WHOLE glass all over the front of herself and on two people's coats that were hanging under the bar right by us. There was seriously a lake on the floor too. Rather than get our asses kicked by a British dyke, we decided it would be good to make a quick exit. (-: Oy vey. It wasn't so funny walking home dripping beer, but it's hilarious now....then I proceeded to spill an entire Coke in my lap on the plane ride home, so we're even at least. (-:
New York was fun too. I'm shocked that we were able to fit as much as we did into that day and a half. We went to Times Square, Rockefeller Center, the Empire State Building, Greenwich Village, and took a boat tour around the island of Manhattan and saw the Statue of Liberty and tons of other sites. We also went to the World Trade Center site. That, I must say, was very moving...basically...it just makes you feel very very quiet and pensive. It's so HUGE. Then in the one corner there is just this battered stairway that goes up to nothing. They plan to start rebuilding this summer, so I'm glad that I got to see it the way it is now. It was very thought-provoking to be standing in the place where so many people died. It was really hard to imagine how horrible it must have been that day.
Well, I have more to write, but too much work piling up to ignore it any longer. Thankfully, with tomorrow being Good Friday, I'm OFF! Woohoo!
You know, it's very strange. It's funny how love works...it just keeps growing and there's kind of this unlimited supply...you think you love someone the most that you possible can and then you find out that you love them even more. We were committed and connected and we loved each other a LOT before this, but it's amazing how much MORE in love and committed and connected we feel now. It's added a new dimension of permanence to our relationship in such an awesome way. It's funny because I don't think I EVER really spent time thinking about any kind of "wedding" stuff in the context of planning my own. I didn't know I'd ever even WANT that, but now...I'm SO excited about it. I can't wait to make a commitment to her in front of the people that love and support us. No matter what our country says, this marriage will be the real deal for us. I keep thinking about what it will be like, and I just can't wait. I love Christie so much and I'm absolutely sure that she's the only person for me. It's almost strange for someone that can be as indecisive as I can to be SO SURE about something, but I really am. I'm so honored that someone like her would pick me to love. I haven't ever experienced this feeling before, I don't think--of being totally and unconditionally loved back just as much as I love her. I honestly didn't know that it could be as good as it is. I'm still kind of stunned that the "storybook romance" thing actually happened to me. Half the time, I don't feel like I deserve it. I'm so incredibly lucky! I never want to take this for granted. I am totally and completely twitterpated! (-:
The only thing that could make us more happy is if everyone took this as seriously as we do. We have some awesome supportive friends--both gay and straight--who ARE happy for and supportive of us, so it has been really fun to share our happiness with them. It's very strange though--kind of brings this whole gay-marriage debate to a very personal place since it's so very few of my friends or family that I had before we became a couple--not to be able to share this with our families, put it in the paper, show off the ring to everyone, be disgustingly sappy in public (-: etc....Especially the people I've told at work....I just get this polite smile....as if they think I'm a little kid playing "pretend" or something. They have no clue. One told me I was a "funny girl"...one said "what are the rules on that in Pennsylvania"....one said "it's a funny world we live in"....and none have brought it up to me ONCE since I told them or even cared to see the ring or anything. Thank GOD Andrea came by the other day...she's been off of work for a few months now having a really rough time with her pregnancy, but it was so cool to be able to tell someone who was genuinely as happy as I am. She's doing much better and is supposed to come back to work on Tuesday. Yay!
Anyway....The little London/New York vacation was great! It started off a little shaky, but...it turned out to be a fun fun time. Some of the highlights: Well, the beginning of the trip started off smoothly....took the train to New York, got to the airport and to London without a hitch, but then we hit baggage claim...ugggh! Somebody--some ABSOLUTE MORON--we came to find out, took my suitcase instead of theirs. I feel the need to mention that IT WAS A DIFFERENT COLOR! So the first few days were a bit rocky...ended up having to find a mall and buy a bunch of stuff since I had no guarantee I'd get my stuff back at all and I had no clothes or toiletries. The airport had the guy's suitcase that he left there, but no way of contacting him, so needless to say I was ECSTATIC when I found out that he had contacted them and I got my stuff back. After 3 and a half days without anything, I almost didn't care that both of our perfumes were missing....very weird that perfume would be the only thing missing from the suitcase, but....we got everything else. Anyway.....We saw lots of sights in London, hit a few really cool museums, went to Leeds Castle and Oxford, stopped by some "gay London" spots, and ate Cadbury McFlurrys every night. Yum. (The McDonalds' there makes McFlurrys with Cadbury eggs). One of the funniest times (in hindsight) was the night we decided to hit this girl bar called "Candy Bar". They actually don't allow boys in unless they are guests of a dyke. lol Anyway...we sat at the bar, tried to look cool, and ordered a "pint" each of this god-awful bitter beer...we were only a few sips into it when Smouse accidentally spilled the WHOLE glass all over the front of herself and on two people's coats that were hanging under the bar right by us. There was seriously a lake on the floor too. Rather than get our asses kicked by a British dyke, we decided it would be good to make a quick exit. (-: Oy vey. It wasn't so funny walking home dripping beer, but it's hilarious now....then I proceeded to spill an entire Coke in my lap on the plane ride home, so we're even at least. (-:
New York was fun too. I'm shocked that we were able to fit as much as we did into that day and a half. We went to Times Square, Rockefeller Center, the Empire State Building, Greenwich Village, and took a boat tour around the island of Manhattan and saw the Statue of Liberty and tons of other sites. We also went to the World Trade Center site. That, I must say, was very moving...basically...it just makes you feel very very quiet and pensive. It's so HUGE. Then in the one corner there is just this battered stairway that goes up to nothing. They plan to start rebuilding this summer, so I'm glad that I got to see it the way it is now. It was very thought-provoking to be standing in the place where so many people died. It was really hard to imagine how horrible it must have been that day.
Well, I have more to write, but too much work piling up to ignore it any longer. Thankfully, with tomorrow being Good Friday, I'm OFF! Woohoo!
